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To name a thing is to control it...
Sep. 8th, 2003 06:20 pmI've been feeling a bit rubbish the last couple of weeks for no apparent reason, and I've suddenly remembered why.
The Jankness.
I wrote the following paragraph regarding The Jankness in 1997:
The Jankness is a powerful force which causes everything that’s crap and boring in life. This force is highly concentrated in places like Hemel Hempstead. I don’t know who discovered it, but I heard about it from a bloke called Mike, who is an expert. Research suggests that it is a living entity, which can be subdued if the person whom it is plaguing consumes vast quantities of alcohol and/or drugs.
WARNING - it knows its own - if you come from a place where the Jankness is strong, even if you move it may follow you. This has happened to many of my friends and acquaintances who have moved to London and Bournemouth. And me.
Of course, it can’t be done away with, but don’t you feel better knowing who to blame when your last spliffsworth falls on the ground at a woods party - amongst large numbers of incredibly hash-like bits of mud (substitute any mishap, drug-related or otherwise). Hey - and now you know how to alleviate it. Pass on the message.
Get thee hence, Jankness.
The Jankness.
I wrote the following paragraph regarding The Jankness in 1997:
The Jankness is a powerful force which causes everything that’s crap and boring in life. This force is highly concentrated in places like Hemel Hempstead. I don’t know who discovered it, but I heard about it from a bloke called Mike, who is an expert. Research suggests that it is a living entity, which can be subdued if the person whom it is plaguing consumes vast quantities of alcohol and/or drugs.
WARNING - it knows its own - if you come from a place where the Jankness is strong, even if you move it may follow you. This has happened to many of my friends and acquaintances who have moved to London and Bournemouth. And me.
Of course, it can’t be done away with, but don’t you feel better knowing who to blame when your last spliffsworth falls on the ground at a woods party - amongst large numbers of incredibly hash-like bits of mud (substitute any mishap, drug-related or otherwise). Hey - and now you know how to alleviate it. Pass on the message.
Get thee hence, Jankness.
